Awesome Comics of

I just want to update everyone who likes┬áthe awesome comics on┬áMilk For Dead Hamsters. This is probably falling on deaf ears, because I haven’t updated this site in some time. Well, if you are still dropping by and read this, please take a look at my new comics on Because Plarko is an entertainment […]

The Secret to Success

Despite mathematically proving the secret to success, Barry forgot to include one important variable.

My Case For The Colts Job

There is an opening at the helm of the Indianapolis Colts. Consider this my application for the job.

Lady Chinky Eyes

Papa John’s recent flub with a customer’s receipt reminds me of a recent encounter I had.

Math Homework and Racism

What happens when a third grade homework assignment talks about slaves? Outrage!

How I Feel Every New Year’s Eve

New Year’s Eve and Dick Clark: as close a pair you’ll find outside of peanut butter and jelly, or stroke victims and sympathy.

Middle Urinal

Nobody ever wants you.

Milk for the Movies – November ’11

Passing judgment on movies solely based on titles and conjecture since 2011.

A Wise-Ass’s Thanksgiving Prayer

Blah blah blah. Let’s eat.

Google, Y U no like my Doodle?

What does it take to get your doodle chosen by the staff over at Google Doodles?

A Penis With Mustache and Boobs Taking a Shit

When I was at WebcomicsCon, I contributed this inspirational drawing. I gave all that I could, like the Magi.

Scumbag JoePa

Move over, Steve. This guy is a true scumbag.

Pun Fun #1

Puns are terrible. But sometimes you have to go out on a limb and make a tree-iffic one.

Nudity is Streaking Funny

Nothing is funnier than seeing a naked person run through a crowd. I said nothing! If you want to be awesome, make time to streak. (surprisingly safe for work)

How To Google Milk for Dead Hamsters

Sometimes, I can’t help but notice some of the keywords used to get to Milk for Dead Hamsters.

Milk for the Movies – October ’11

October gives us movies that think they are Oscar contenders and really terrible horror flicks. Thank God (and/or science) for pumpkin flavored beer!

Fuck You, One Million Moms
Nobody beats Schweddy's balls.

Nobody can resist Schweddy’s balls? Think again. One Million Moms hate his fudge-covered malt balls. And now I can’t get any.

Sloppy Editing

Greek semen vs regular semen: either way, it doesn’t belong in your yogurt.

Recap of WebcomicsCon

I attended WebcomicsCon on October 1st (not 2nd). It was definitely a learning experience.

Milk for the Movies – September ’11

I’ve seen the September movies and they are 50/50. 50% are unwatchable. And the other 50 are unbearable.

Milk for Dead Hamsters at WebcomicsCon (prelude)

I’ll be at Webcomicscon on Oct 1 and 2. Stop by my table and I’ll have an awkward conversation with you.

My Morning News Break
My Morning News Break

I like to keep up with news that matters.

Milk for the Movies – August ’11

The summer movie season goes out with a bang. Coincidentally, so does a shotgun to one’s head.

Phuck Phonics
I can't read this shit!

In English, the process of connecting sounds with letters is called “phonics,” or if you ask many grade-schoolers, “fucked up bullshit.”

Wealthy duchess gives fortune away to marry
Wealthy Duchess

A wealthy Spanish duchess is giving all of her money away before marrying a much younger man. What does her future groom think about that?

Me Loves Me Some Shark Week
Shark Week!

I just loves sharks and I found a gem of a show called Shark Attack Survival Guide. Its host, Terry Schappert, uses his experiences in Iraq to help us survive during a shark attack.

Another Musician Dead at 27
Amy Winehouse

Amy Winehouse joins an exclusive club with the likes of Jim Morisson, Jimi Hendrix and Janis Joplin; that is, if they let her in.

Milk for the Movies – July ’11

Love original ideas? Then you’ll hate July: five adaptations, a remake, and a blatant ripoff. Thankfully “Zookeeper” keeps things fresh.

Milk at ConnectiCon 2011

Pat went to Connecticon over the weekend and he saw artists, costumed heroes, and some guy’s butt. Read all about his adventure.

Mr. Green Fact Generator

Mr. Green was a math teacher at the high school I attended. Here are some of the fondest memories collected about the man.

Poop Burgers
Poop Burger

The May comic, “The Food Cycle,” mimics the real life efforts of a Japanese scientist who wants to bring the joy of shit to everyone.

Milk for the Movies – June ’11

Did the May movies get you down? Well have no fear! June has mutants, a green flying man and giant space robots to bring you down even further!

Chart: Probability of Weiner Outcome
Weiner Scandal outcome

This whole storyline, affectionately called Weiner-gate, made me really wonder what will eventually become of the Congressman.

Milk for the Movies – May ’11

Summer has arrived, at least according to Hollywood. The summer season kicks off 50 days before the solstice with a batch of duds.

Milk for the Movies – April ’11

Reviewing the recent junk that Hollywood has to offer. Why do I go see these movies? So you don’t have to.


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Milk for Dead Hamsters

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