Monte Carlo
“It’s the best movie I’ve ever seen” – girl who has only seen one movie.

Larry Crowne
Tom Hanks returns to college and instead of going after hot, young girls, he woos Julia Roberts.
Realistic? Yes.
Boring? You bet!

No, Kevin James’ career isn’t playing opossum. It is actually dead.

Horrible Bosses
Finally – A movie that shows the lighter side of murder!

Harry Potter and the Deathly Hallows: Part II
We find out why Lord Voldemort has been so pissed all these years. Harry Potter’s got his nose.

Winnie the Pooh
If your child likes Winnie the Pooh, he will grow up to be bullied by kids who like cool things.

Captain America
Attention rest of the world: if you fuck with America, we will take our weakest citizen and turn him into a wrecking ball programmed to destroy you. Got that, North Korea? How about you, Libya? You don’t want us sending you this guy.

Friends With Benefits
Ashton Kutcher and Natalie Portman have sensational chemistry and screen presence. A one-of-a-kind romantic comedy.

The Smurfs
It took me 20 years to get that damn song out of my head. And it took 20 seconds of hearing it again to slip back into my dark place.

Cowboys and Aliens
Mexicans develop advanced weapons and technology to invade America. Texans find a way to keep them out by gittin’ drunk and shootin’ thar guns.


One thought on “Milk for the Movies – July ’11

  1. Maria says:

    Oh God. Zookeeper was soooooo bad. I hope Kevin James’ career is dead so I’ll never have to witness another trainwreck like this one.

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