Surprised by the amount of money in this film.
Disappointed in the number of balls.
Ides of March
I’d say the ides have it!*
Maybe you shouldn’t march to go see it.*
In the future, man has the ability to create incredibly big and strong robots that do thine bidding. What do people do with them? Fight! Actually, that sounds pretty realistic.
The Big Year
This movie was based on a magazine article. That’s not a joke. It’s a fact. Here’s the joke: The magazine was actually a calendar.*
Hey, hey! What’s this I see? I thought this was a movie. LET’S ENTERTAIN!
Does not have anything to do with the Fantastic Four; therefore, nothing to do with Jessica Alba; therefore, sucked.
Johnny English Reborn
Rowan Atkinson: the source of every white person joke told by black people.
Paranormal Activity 3
It’s so scary that I couldn’t finish watching it. It’s so redundant that I never started.
Three Musketeers 3D
Nothing compared to the 1993 version. Rebecca De Mornay’s career is rolling in its grave.
Puss in Boots
I couldn’t stop laughing through the whole movie! This was mostly because I added a “y” to the sign before entering the theater.**
The Rum Diary
How do you make drinking notsofun? Write a diary about it. Then make a movie about the diary. Then fall asleep during that movie. Then get kicked out for having a violent night terror in the middle of a crowded theater.
I kept saying after every scene, “He is just ‘in time’. Justin Timeberlake.” After 50 or so times, it became reeeeeally funny.
**also I changed a “t” into a “b”